BB9. Arse.

So Mario got the bullet and not Becs. Quite how much a contributory factor snogging Luke on eviction night eve was in keeping her in is questionable though a three to one ratio of votes suggest not much. Eviction day day saw Luke telling everyone within earshot that he'd 'been intimate' with Becs when in fact he meant that he'd snogged a pissed-up groupie. Becs tried very hard to give the impression that she would normally only ever been intimate, with Justin Timberlake looky-likeys and was beside herself that somehow - SHOCK!, HORROR! - she'd lowered herself to frenchie Luke. Needlesss to say when they were together later they behaved like 12 year old kids; "it was you!", "No, it was you!" "Hehehehehe!". Rebecca is 21 years of age and has been known to be employed as a child-minder - quite which is the more frightening fact is open to debate.

After promising revelations and embarrassments a-plenty, Mario eventually exited like a kitten. Shame on you Mario.
The question of how many of the housemates have actually watched BB came to light again as they assumed that Rebecca was now a hit with viewers when in fact all it proved was that Mario was more the more reviled of the two. Stuart wondering how many weeks they were in the house for didn't exactly bolster confidence in their BB knowledge either, all which may go to prove that just being on BB is enough for most housemates - think of those lovely lucrative media interviews, yum yum....

I watch too much BB which is pretty much watching any BB....

The referee's a barsteward...

This is just funny beyond words. "Yesh, I having the bad back thash all..."

BB9 - an idiot writes....

Day 37 - an eviction night!
Becks - is going which means....
Mario - will think he's bulletproof. Should prove interesting / hilarious / embarrassing.
Lisa - looked like she was going to do herself a world of good by falling out with Mario only to revert to type by apologising and appering to turn into a Stepford Wife. Pity.
Michael - seedy and soapy looking. In the thrall of Mario. I'll be surprised if he makes the final four.
Luke - now officially creepy. Not half as funny as he imagines himself to be, you'll have a job finding another housemate that's ever banged on about the prize money as much.
Rex - seriously, what shape is that blokes head meant to be?!!
Lisa - girl in work still insists she's a bloke.
Sara - blatantly draping herself over any male in sight. A shrew(d) move as females seem to have a remarkably short lifespan in the house. Excluding Katie Whatserface and the transexual/trnsgender one as far as I can recollect no other females have won. And Katie Whatserface was way back in BB2. It's all the late teen/early twenties females voting that does it dontchaknow.
Dale - Am I still the only one that remebers the audition tpae he did in which he basically stated that he wouldn't talk to ugly people and that he'd backstab anyone to win? Or was he just lying through his teeth? Has a good chance of winning - it's all the late teen/early twenties females voting....
Stuart - tall. Cries. Eyelashes. Along with Dale made an arse of himself during the picture row (and doesn't that now seem an age ago?). Could go all the way as per Dale but it's less likely truth be told.
Rachel - who?
Darnell & Mo - plodding along nicely before they got themselves involved with Mario in the booze stealing bizniss. Also-rans.
Belinda - nightmare, nightmare, nightmare. Ha ha ha.
Kat - cookies! Happy, happy, happy house! Kissed Sara. No more or less fake than any of the other housemates. May shade it over Dale due to BB voters apparent preference for 'outrageous zanniness'.
Maysoon - a dark horse and as such difficult to assess. May get stronger but being a female odds are against her winning.

Heavy rotation casa softlad
'Fsosf' - Bassnectar

Glasto on 't telly.

Only caught bits......
Hot Chip
Said it before, say it again; Hot Chip are awful. They looked like bank managers / accountants and sounded like a bontempi rave band but not in a good way. Rubbish.
Black Kids
Zane Lowe introduced them and I thought he said 'Blackheads'. 20 seconds in I was switching over. Out of tune is the El Nuevo Sonido apparently.
Neil Diamond
Sweeeeeeeeeet Carolineeeeeee, doooooo, deeeeeeee, doooooooooo..... You can't beat a bit of Neil. Only a bit mind.
Jack Penate
Who?
James Blunt
Why?!
Newton Faulkner
Superannuated busker.
Amy Winehouse
Evidently requires a translator and solicitor to be in 24/7 attendance please.
Some American Bloke
We've had John Cougar Mellencamp thanks, I didn't like him then and I don't like you now.
Eddy Grant
Nice geezer. Plays 'reggae' in the same sense that Black Lace play 'rock'. Ideal festival fodder.
Jay Zed
Came, saw conquered. Murdered 'Wonderwall', taught us music is a broad church, preached toleration, 99 red balloons, yadda, yadda, yadda. Oddly though I'm still no closer stomaching the line of rap peddled by Mr Zed and his peers, give me da olde skool homes....
The Wombats
New to me and I like 'em. Good one.
Goldfrapp
Glastonbury / Reading etc are rock panto and as such not the ideal venue for the current Goldfrapp experience. Thought they were excellent as usual, however seeing them hasn't helped re the Goldfrapp Lovebox dilemma - I want to see them yet again but not at a bloody festival. Choices, choices....


Recording Goldfrapps Glasto performance....
Satellite. Cable. Freeview. Freesat. HD. Digital. Enough is enough. I own a personal video recorder that enables me to record two channels simultaneously onto a hard drive and I know how to use it. I'm no expert on all things video, but I'm fairly savvy re what goes where and how to use it. Tonight however confusion reigned.
BBC is broadcasting Glastonbury and, fair play to them, they are trying to broadcast as much as possible. Me? I just want to catch Goldfrapp. But there are four channels transmitting and only two are on Freeview. The other two channels are on digital. But what constitutes 'digital'?
Presumably cable and satellite are digital but they cost money to subscribe to. Freesat is theoretically free however, even if you exclude the installation fee (currently well over £100), I cannot receive the signal because of where I am. So what does that mean? For me, paying out more cash. A bit of a micky-take given that the BBC has been a prime mover behind Freesat and is currently getting a fair old wedge from all and sundry in the shape of a license fee. Freeview appears to be redundant even before it's begun despite the BBC, amongst others, pushing it whilst being fully aware that Freesat would supersede it.
I think it's safe to say I'm fairly unimpressed.

Having a moment... 01
Bewitched As I Am - Bent 128Kb

Song 02.
'Weightlifting' - Trashcan Sinatras
So lovely I can't bring myself to listen to the album in case it's not as good.

softlad spends, UK economy saved!

Been bargain hunting in real life stores as opposed to online.
Taschen hardback book, 'Gil Elvgren - The Complete Pin-Ups' - £6
Tony Nourmand & Graham Marsh - 'Film Posters - Exploitation' - £6
'Battlestar Galactica Series 1 - 3' DVD boxed set - £30
'The Coen Brothers Collection' DVD boxed set - £10
Note how the in-store prices are less expensive than the online equivalent. Actually bought the Gil Elvgren book at HMV but they don't sell books online any more(?!)

The Coen Bros. set has the widescreen version of 'Blood Simple' as opposed to the 'pan and scan' budget release. I've not seen 'Barton Fink' nor 'Hudsucker Proxy' either so bit of a result. Lots of people have been raving about the new 'Battlestar Galactica' so I thought I'd give it a go.
Also noticed on a website a few days ago the release of 'What Does It All Mean? 1983-2006 Retrospective' by Steinski. It's a two disc limited edition so I've quickly bagged one from Amazon US. Also got '2001' on Blu-ray to make up the customs allowance.

I love Gil Elvgren's pin-ups, I've had his calenders in my kitchen for the last few years. Here's a little insight into before and after which I found on this site.



Goldfrapp at Lovebox Sun 20/07/08
Goldfrapp are playing the Lovebox Weekender at Victoria park in east London. Having never been to a festival I'm torn...

Pros:
Goldfrapp - Live! And most likely there will be the full gear including dancers.
The Flaming Lips - a real experience live by all accounts and I loved 'The Soft Bulletin'.
The Go! Team - Loved 'Thunder, Lightning, Strike' and they were great on BBC 2's 'Later'.
Other GMB members in attendance.
Cibelle - I have a CD/DVD single of hers which is off-kilter latin loveliness so she would be worth checking out.

Cibelle covers Nirvana's 'About A Girl'.

Cons:
If it rains you're fecked.
Dislike the thought of being crushed at the front of the crowd for the Main Stage to the same degree that I dislike the thought of being stuck half a mile away from said stage.
Queuing for basic things like food, drink and toilets.
Being surrounded by young, fun people all day long. *shudders*
Being surrounded by thieves, gate crashers and druggies. *shudders*
It's on a Sunday which means that I'd really want to book the Monday as a day off.

Can't make my mind up, I just don't know.....

Spain win Euro '08
Spain beat Germany and deservedly so with Torres getting the winner. For a short while at least all is well in the footballing world. Viva España.

Goldfrapp Vs Royal Albert Hall - no contest.

What a soiree - it had everything bar the kitchen sink. Fan-bloody-tastic.
First time I've been inside the RAH and it's big. Massive big. I must admit sitting there before the kick off I did wonder whether the Seventh Tree songs could be done justice. Turns out that everything went swimmingly.
I was almost late getting to the hall in the first place and in my hurry it appears that I missed notices on the doors stating that by attending everyone was giving implicit permission to be filmed. Make what you will of that. Possible live DVD in the works somewhere down the line?
Just managed a quick trip to the bar as I was gasping. £3.80 for a bottle of Becks!
Me; "Can I have a plastic cup to take into the hall please?"
Barman aka Lord Snooty Snootington of Belgravia; "This is the Royal Albert Hall! We don't do that here!"
Brilliant, wouldn't have expected any less.
Have to say that Goldfrapp are unique, "Number one in a field of one" as Mad magazine would have it. No other band has all the qualities of Goldfrapp at the moment - not one. Best pop group around, tight band, a live show to kill for and a constant will to explore and experiment. Peerless.
Photos were taken however the camera was set incorrectly (arse!) so I've had to try and salvage what I can to put up on Flickr.
Icing on the cake was getting to meet a few people from the Goldfrapp Message Board; Halloween Jack, Alpa, Micky and poor old Peter who I hijacked and took to Cuba. Sorry, that should be Leytonstone.

So Spain tonk Russia 3-0 and meet Germany in the final. Of the two teams Russia were the ones that had the makings of being able to stop the Germans. A twist of fate could play a part though as one of Spains best players, Villa, is now injured and out of the final.; cue the Barcalona Posee in full effect. Still, regarding who'll win the final, my heart says Spain but my head says Germany.

I should stay in more.

Not very often I find myself in a record store these days but I popped into HMV today to get the new Goldfrapp single 'Caravan Girl' only to find that it's actually released next week. Arse. Having made the trip and noticing there was a sale on I took a wander 'round the store thinking I might get a Chris Rock or George Carlin DVD when I noticed this;


It's not really all that apparent at first glance but 99% of the films in this section are made by / star black people. What purpose does this section serve? Seriously. I find it hard to believe that people go into HMV and ask the staff "Excuse me where do you keep the black movies please?" so why does this section exist? Not doubt it was created with the best of intentions but I thought we were all supposed to be living in a multi-racial society? I can't help but think that it's the same mindset that has produced the MOBOs and personally I think it's wrong-headed.
Ended up getting a 'Best Of Smash Hits - The 80's' annual - £3! And comes with a free Wham! & John Taylor poster!! Also got 'The Devil Wears Prada' on DVD for £3. Bargained up big time baby!
Felt like a shoplifter when I left.
But that might just have been the security alarms going off.

Also went to WHSmith (boy, when I paint the town red it stays red!) and there right next to all the books on 'Travel', 'Cookery', 'Art' etc there now exists a fantastic new section;

A sub-heading is born.

Off to the Royal Albert Hall tomorrow to see the imperious Goldfrapp. Big update pending. All excited? I know I am!

The Candy man can.

Just finished watching 'Planes, Trains & Automobiles' for the Nth time. LOVE this film, a comedy that can bring a lump to my throat time and again just the way 'It's A Wonderful Life' does. PT&A and 'Uncle Buck'. Fan - tastic. Both directed and written by John Hughes on full tilt and both PT&A and Hughe's 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off' have cameos by the excellent Edie McClurg and Yellos 'Oh Yeah'. As for John Candy - whattaguy.

'Oh Yeah' - Yello

The Garden Of Delights.

I went to see The Garden Of Delights which was part of the Greenwich Festival Bites Weekend. Bunch of gay and lesbian bods in PVC demonstrating S&M role play - I kid you not. Fun for all the family. Lasted about 45 minutes and remained intriguing from beginning to end. Two thumbs up (as it were), definite entry in the diary for next year.

Hardly ever drink but I went for a pint at a certain reputable pub in Greenwich before heading home.  Sunday, five in the afternoon, lovely day, beer garden, parents with kids in tow etc.  Sitting there chilling when I clock one of the barmen, who appears to be in charge, wearing this t-shirt in green;

He's in his early twenties this bloke and just as I'm about to go, as chance would have it, he was stood in front of me behind the bar doing the glasses.  

softlad - "Alright mate.  You the Manager?"  

Barman - "No," - he sounded apologetic - "I'm just the most experienced here so I'm sort of in charge."  Italian accent.

softlad - "Listen not being funny or anything but that t shirt... I mean I don't even have kids but that t shirt makes me uncomfortable that you're letting kids in here and you're wearing that shirt."

Barman - "I know." Shrug.

softlad - "Hey, whatever.  You wear whatever you like mate but to me that's not appropriate for a family pub.  Have a good day yeah?"

Barman - "Yes." Shrug and a look of 'What can I tell you?'

Exit softlad. 

I'm the new Mary Whitehouse - didn't see that coming.

Eat my foot!

Euro 08 quarter-final and ITV finally enter the fray. Jim Beglin: "They're not very fluid at the moment the Dutch. They're not flowing." Is this Alan Partridge's "liquid football"?

The Exxon Mobil ad on TV - watch the pretty computer graphics as an Italian MILF and your Mum and Dad shovel shit down your ears whilst trying to convince one and all that Exxon Mobil really, really care. To point out that what they care about is actually vast profits and feck all else seems a trifle blindingly obvious but I'm off to Google 'Italian MILF' so I don't, er, care.

Been experimenting with Sainsbury, Asda and Somerfield own-brand bargain basement milk chocolate and I like it. Yes, it turns out I have cheap and slutty taste buds but at about 25p for a bar who gives a hoot - huzzah!

Say wha'?

Player quote of Euro '08 so far? Ballack of Germany when asked about his blatantly pushing the Portugese defender (and fellow Chelsea teammate) Ferreira to score the third and decisive goal; "Oh it was difficult to say. There were a lot of pushes during the match in the box, I'll have to see it on the TV."

I'm currently all Mac'd up and been unhappy with Safari for some time now. Then I somehow stumbled across a possible reason why from someone who evidently knows more about these things than I do. That pretty much made up my mind up to try the new Firefox 3.0. I've used it for several days now and it's loading quicker than Safari and it's more stable. Fingers crossed it keeps up....

Song 01.
'Central Reservation' (William Orbit Remix) - Beth Orton
Love the way the remix just takes off in the middle. Delightful.

Panekiller.

Long story short. The window in the bedroom got broken and I now know that;
A) it costs £125 + VAT to get a window boarded up.
B) it costs £310 to have a 4' x 3' sheet of window replaced. Interestingly it was offered at £265 for cash which is basically the £310 without the VAT.
Now the wrangling with the insurance begins...

Mark Lawrenson commenting on Austria V Germany on BBC1s Euro '08 managing to muddle up two expressions to announce "That's got hospital food written all over it". Indeed.

'Hancock' arriving.

Just used the PS3 to watch the second HD  trailer for 'Hancock' (which clocks in at over three minutes long) and have become convinced that I now don't need to see the movie as they appear to have supplied the plot and a great many of the good bits.  Cheers Columbia, much obliged.

Went to the Blackheath Kite Festival yesterday (Sat) to get some snaps after spotting it was on using the excellent Upcoming site.  Quite funny as the weather was changeable.  When the sun went in the wind built up and the kite fliers were in their element.  When the sun came out however the fliers were becalmed but everyone else was pleased.  Needless to say the weather swung one way then the other all afternoon.  Interesting couple of hours.  No pies were eaten.

Ads on TV are annoying but how much more annoying they are in a recession when they're by banks, petrol companies and car manufacturers.  One car ad has the matchless "A whisper is louder than a shout".  Er, it what sense?  In no sense at all matey, no sense at all....  And Halifax - always intensely annoying with their 'Look - it's our smug staff!' shtick - have now taken to ripping off Terry Gilliam.  Having buildings set sail was done in 'The Crimson Permanent Assurance' but what's a piece of plagiarism when you can't be arsed thinking of something original.  Grrr.

Now to try posting a photo.....

Looking good.  Now I need to fink....

Testing one, two, one, two....

I now have a blog.  Gawd help us all.